Ah-Chooo!

Does anyone else have a dog that sneezes? I don't mean sneezes every once in a while... I mean sneezes, like a human, three or four times in a row. No she's not sick. It's so bizarre. Another question... does anyone have a "normal" dog? Cuz I just seem to get all the strange ones, the ones with food allergies, the ones that bite people, the ones with seperation anxiety, the ones that pee in the house, the ones that chase squirrels (and lawn ornaments), and the ones that sneeze uncontrollably. I'm beginning to think that those well behaved golden retreviers I see walking in the park are actually robots, not dogs.

Thunder and Lightning, very, very frightening...

It's been storming on and off all weekend. This afternoon I was in the kitchen sitting at the computer when a loud peal of thunder shook the windows. Miss M was playing on the floor behind me and didn't seem to notice, but big dog S was terrified. He was desperate to get beneath the counter by my feet and hide, so I pushed out my chair to let him in. But the hiding place was already taken, by a cowering little jack russell terrier. I hadn't even felt P wiggle under there. My two dogs are scaredy-cats.

Big S needs a labotomy...

Topic of this entry is my other, less desirable, never adorable, child... Big S the dog. Big S is wearing out his welcome.

Big S got to spend the day separated from his cohort Little P. Little P is a bad influence on the big oaf. So Big S got locked in our bedroom for the day while Little P got gated in the mud room. But Big S can open doors, and he escaped, and rebelled. He pooped in Miss M's room, peed on a basket of her toys, ate a whole bag of homemade cookies, and tore up the bathroom trash. What fun for him, what a mess for us. He was chastised, and I know that people say that once the damage is done a dog doesn't know what he's being disciplined for, but I think Big S knew because the next day he was a relative angel. Seriously, anyone need an extra oaf? I have one, give him to you free!

But alas, I'm afraid my hopes of freeing myself from the obligation that is Bis S will be dashed with my next revelation. Last night I took Big S to the vet to finally check out the pink spots on his belly. And walked out $370 poorer. Apparently the food alergies that have caused him to itch have resulted in an itch-induced bacterial infection that requires the world's most expensive antibiotics, and the world's most expensive anti-histamines (and anti-fungal shampoo, and fish oil capsules). So now we need to figure out yet another food option for him, clear up this infection, and try to keep him from getting another one, or he will once again be perscribed the world's most expensive antibiotics. Do I have time for a high maintenance dog? NO! Am I going to take care of this idiot until the day he dies? YES. I'm such a sucker. On the up side, we learned that Big S does not have arthritis, as a previously (clueless) vet had suggested.

Our boring week...

OK, so this video would be totally boring if you're not a family member. It's Miss M's recent highlights - standing and crawling - and a little bit of dogs acting like morons.

torpedo!

OK, hopefully I can describe this well enough so that you all can visualize it and appreciate the hilarity of this event.

Yesterday I was with M in her nursery and I had just let the dogs in from outside. The Jack Russell goes bat-shit-crazy and starts running back and forth between the nursery and our bedroom. We have hardwood floors. Every time the dog makes the lap into our bedroom she slams on the breaks and slides the last two feet into our bedroom, sliding right under the dust-ruffle, right under the bed. Then I hear feet scrambling (vis-a-vis old bugs bunny cartoon - coyote running in place gearing up for a chase) and then the dog comes shooting out from under the bed like a little black and white torpedo.

I laughed my ass off. Then Miss M started laughing at me laughing at the dog. Then the other dog (S) starting freaking out because he thought something bad was happening... which made me laugh even harder. It was a good night.

Two baths in one day.

Small dogs like to smell like sh*t. P recieved two baths in one day after rolling in it twice. If humans can evolve away from their primative defense mechanisms why can't dogs? When was the last time a pampered Jack Russell Terrier needed to hide it's scent from predator and prey? Unless you count the stuffed terry-cloth bunny hiding under the coffee table, P has no prey.... therefore no need to smell like crap.