Today I wielded a big stick and tried to whack my way through the jungle that is my front yard. The previous, previous, owners of this House must spent a good deal of time and money landscaping - however, the in-between owners didn't seem to give a crap. And hence, bushes attack my car every time I exit the garage, and small woodland creatures have taken up permanent residence amongst the hostas and the weeds. I don't think I've ever actually seen a thistle before today - unless it was in a cartoon protecting some kind of elf or fairy.
I had thought to leave this labor to the pros and hire a landscaper, but apparently the landscaper doesn't want to deal with this mess either because it turns out it would cost $2,000 to dig our way out of the Amazon. I may have four feet tall spiky weeds slowly encircling my home, but you know what I don't have? Two thousand dollars! So a-whacking I shall go, doing my best to tame this wild earth, one thistle at a time.
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