Saturday, October 31, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
Most Beautiful Word in the English Language
Mommy. A blessing and a curse. For the first 14 months of her life I coaxed that word from her pretty little lips. It appears that I was too eager. Let me paint a little picture...
I'm sitting on the couch in our family room, finally relaxing after a day of play-doh, chicken nuggets, Elmo and dance class. I'm trying to focus on the glass of wine in my hand and the episode of The Office that I missed. I'm trying to have a Calgon moment. But the serenity of my un-wind time has been breached by a persistent chorus of the many variations on one word. Mommy. "Mama... Mama... Mommy, Mommy, MOMMY! Ma ma ma ma ma... MAAAAMAAAAAAAAA!! Uh oh! Mommy?? Mama? MOMMY!!!!!!!! Mama, Mama..." Re-read the previous sentence for about a half an hour and consider yourself initiated into my own private hell. A hell where the sweetest word you've ever heard is repeated so many times you want to stab yourself in the ear with a pencil.
The baby monitor is no longer my friend. It is from hence forth to be considered an instrument of terror (or "terra" if you're from Texas). It is an evil baby monitor, hell bent on destroying any semblance of rationality I may still possess. I think it might be Chuckie's baby montitor actually.
I'm sitting on the couch in our family room, finally relaxing after a day of play-doh, chicken nuggets, Elmo and dance class. I'm trying to focus on the glass of wine in my hand and the episode of The Office that I missed. I'm trying to have a Calgon moment. But the serenity of my un-wind time has been breached by a persistent chorus of the many variations on one word. Mommy. "Mama... Mama... Mommy, Mommy, MOMMY! Ma ma ma ma ma... MAAAAMAAAAAAAAA!! Uh oh! Mommy?? Mama? MOMMY!!!!!!!! Mama, Mama..." Re-read the previous sentence for about a half an hour and consider yourself initiated into my own private hell. A hell where the sweetest word you've ever heard is repeated so many times you want to stab yourself in the ear with a pencil.
The baby monitor is no longer my friend. It is from hence forth to be considered an instrument of terror (or "terra" if you're from Texas). It is an evil baby monitor, hell bent on destroying any semblance of rationality I may still possess. I think it might be Chuckie's baby montitor actually.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Toothbrush
Maggie has been "brushing" (and I use the term loosely) her teeth for quite a while now, but as with everything else in her life, she's growing up so fast and it's time to kick the brushing up a notch.
Today instead of just sucking on the wet toothbrush and throwing it on the floor, she grabbed the toothpaste, attempted to apply the toothpaste, rinsed her brush under the water, tried to cup water in her hands to rinse her mouth, and then spit... and spit again... and again.. etc. Then she went to the other side of the counter to spit in Daddy's sink. Then she spit in the shower. The spitting is clearly the best part.
Today instead of just sucking on the wet toothbrush and throwing it on the floor, she grabbed the toothpaste, attempted to apply the toothpaste, rinsed her brush under the water, tried to cup water in her hands to rinse her mouth, and then spit... and spit again... and again.. etc. Then she went to the other side of the counter to spit in Daddy's sink. Then she spit in the shower. The spitting is clearly the best part.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Hat
Yesterday Maggie was playing with her Sesame Street sticker book when she discovered there were pictures of hats in that book. She pulled the hat stickers out of the book and put them on her head. She wore two hat stickers on her head for most of the afternoon - it was just so ridiculous, for my own amusement I allowed them to stay there.
And speaking of hats... she recently received a care package of sorts from her GiGi (Grandma Calhoun). This package contained some cozy jammies and a couple homemade knit hats. Apparently these hats are super duper cool in Maggie's world, cuz every time I put one of them on her head she refuses to take it off. Today we had gymnastics class at Little Gym and she spent the better half of the class trying to do somersaults while wearing a hat with a big poofy pom-pom on top. She kinda looked like one of those kids that marches to a different drummer (while being photographed for a J-Crew catalogue)... like the kind of kid that would wear super hero pajamas to school someday. Not quite sure how I feel about that... but I think I'm feeling good :)
And speaking of hats... she recently received a care package of sorts from her GiGi (Grandma Calhoun). This package contained some cozy jammies and a couple homemade knit hats. Apparently these hats are super duper cool in Maggie's world, cuz every time I put one of them on her head she refuses to take it off. Today we had gymnastics class at Little Gym and she spent the better half of the class trying to do somersaults while wearing a hat with a big poofy pom-pom on top. She kinda looked like one of those kids that marches to a different drummer (while being photographed for a J-Crew catalogue)... like the kind of kid that would wear super hero pajamas to school someday. Not quite sure how I feel about that... but I think I'm feeling good :)
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Pfffwwtt!!!
Walter, I think Maggie was channeling you tonight.
Not much to do tonight, so Maggie and I spent the evening in the rumpus room (i.e. basement) watching cake shows on TV and playing with toys. Needless to say, she eventually got bored and decided to climb all over me, wipe her boogers on me, and then lick me. She saw that she had slobbered me pretty good and decided she better wipe me off with a tissue... but once I was dry, I must have been too dry because I was slobbered once again. Then I could see the little light bulb go on inside her baby brain... she leaned down and instead of merely licking me, she zerberted me (otherwise known as blowing raspberries)! I laughed hysterically and she did it again, and again, and again, and again. Fifteen minutes later and I'm covered in toddler spit and about ready to pee my pampers from laughing so hard. Time to call it quits with the tongue lashing for tonight. Babies are so much fun :)
Not much to do tonight, so Maggie and I spent the evening in the rumpus room (i.e. basement) watching cake shows on TV and playing with toys. Needless to say, she eventually got bored and decided to climb all over me, wipe her boogers on me, and then lick me. She saw that she had slobbered me pretty good and decided she better wipe me off with a tissue... but once I was dry, I must have been too dry because I was slobbered once again. Then I could see the little light bulb go on inside her baby brain... she leaned down and instead of merely licking me, she zerberted me (otherwise known as blowing raspberries)! I laughed hysterically and she did it again, and again, and again, and again. Fifteen minutes later and I'm covered in toddler spit and about ready to pee my pampers from laughing so hard. Time to call it quits with the tongue lashing for tonight. Babies are so much fun :)
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Martha Stewart is one crazy b...
I'm currently watching Martha Stewart scrape the red skin off small radishes, dig holes into them, stuff olives into those holes, and finally freeze the radish/olive "eyeballs" into ice cubes for Halloween High-balls, perfect for parties! Gimme a break. Who in the world has enough time on their hands to scrape individual radishes, just so that people can dump them in the trash once they realize that Martha put a damn radish in their perfectly good cocktail? You gotta love Martha for her deluded commitment to goofy crap. Just watch her Halloween special, now playing on FLN, and you'll see what I mean.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Rain
Rain, yuck. We've had so many rainy days in the past two weeks, is it always this wet in the fall? For some reason now that it is raining and consistently below 55 degrees, Maggie has decided that she needs to go outside and play on her swing set every single day, multiple times a day. Everyday she runs up to the patio door, points out the window and says, "Weeee!! Weeee!!" So what if it's pouring sheets of rain, "Wee, Wee!!"... it's gusting Wizard of Oz force winds, "Wee, Wee!!"... Frosty the Snowman just sauntered past the front window and waved, "Weee, Weee!!" She didn't care about that dang swing set all summer long, but now it's all she wants to do. Maggie, I have two words for you, No way...you're going outside without a hat and gloves, bundle up baby girl, let's go swing.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
New Job
Seriously, why do I have a pathological need to over-extend myself? Chasing a toddler and hauling her all over town is not exhausting enough, so now I've added Monday and Friday at the craft store to my weekly regime. What started as a whim is now a job... a minimum wage job... with other women, most of whom are near retirement age, and refer to me as "the new girl". I haven't had anyone call me a "girl" in a while, not sure if I like it or not. Jury is still out on this decision, but so far so good. It's super easy, minimum commitment, and a nice way to get away from all the snot, poop, and head injuries at home.
Hannah's
Hannah's
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